One Step Forward, Two Steps Back
by kateandharvey
Summary: Their jumbled lives some how sort each other out. Juliet/Carlton
1. Chapter 1

A/N: It feels so good to be back! (Even though I'm in a totally different fandom!) I've read almost every Lassiet fic on here and I really want to populate the Psych fandom with more of it! :) This is my first Psych fic, so please give me feedback. (But please be tactful.) Let me know if it's good, bad, etc. It will be greatly appreciated.

Disclaimer: I do not own "Psych" or any of its characters including but not limited to Carlton Lassiter, Juliet O'Hara, and/or Shawn Spencer.

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Chapter 1

kateandharvey

Carlton Lassiter had never really considered himself a weak person.

Then _it_happened.

He'd sat in countless interrogation rooms while the suspect drug his name through the mud. They've bashed his face, his clothes, his hair, his ears, his shoes... It didn't matter to him. It never _bothered_him.

He'd worked on countless cases where a fellow officer was taken hostage, and it was up to him to find them. He'd worked hard, every time. He'd stay late into the night and early the next morning trying to solve the puzzle of where the creep had their man. Most of the time the puzzle was solved, and when it was he wouldn't lose much sleep over it. The officer would be rescued and sent to the hospital for examination. He'd return home and climb into his warm comfy bed.

But it wasn't just an officer. It was _her_.

They'd taken _her_.

_"Police say Darrell Rutherfords escaped from Lexington County Jail last night, just out of Santa Barbara. The suspect is armed and dangerous, so be on the look out." It blared from the TV, the news anchor stiffly reading it off of her card. _

_He'd looked at her, and told her, "Be careful, O'Hara."_

_"It's the last worry I have, Carlton. It should be last on your list, too."_

He couldn't go to the hospital. Going would only leave him weaker than he already was. So here he stood, outside her door. Flowers in hand. His eyes lids weighed that of two-ton bricks, but he couldn't go home. He needed to see her first. He knew he looked like crap. He knew he smelled like it, too. She was taken four days ago, and he hadn't showered since then. He had barely left the station to take a nap, and it's occurrence was only after Chief had given him the talk he never understood before. "Lassiter. You're no help to her drooling on your desk. Go home. Get some sleep, and eat something."

He wasn't sleeping but thirty minutes when he got the call. They got a lead.

A whole SWAT team and three hours later, he knocked on her door.

He could hear her soft feet padding against the wooden floor, coming closer and closer to the door. He took a deep breath, and it opened.

The look of shock on her face was a little surprising to him. Had she thought he wouldn't come? That he'd forgotten about her?

"Hi."

He cleared his throat stiffly. "Hello, O'Hara." She silently stepped back into the house, holding the door open for him. He entered, and after she closed the door an awkward silence enveloped them. "You, uh- I..." He sighed. "I, uh, brought you this." He held the potted arrangement out to her.

She smiled faintly and took it from his hands. "Thank you, Carlton."

She walked further into the room, and set the pot onto the coffee table. He took it as a signal to enter a little farther, and as he did he began an attempt at breaking the silence. "I figured Spencer took care of all the stuffed bear arrangements." He glanced nervously about, hands in pockets. He slightly rocked. Forward, backward. Forward, backward. He reached up and scratched the back of his head. "It's not much, but..." He nodded towards the plant. "They had a little puppy dog, with the big, round, blue eyes. I didn't want to be caught with it, though." He forced a chuckle. "So, I picked that one up for you." He nodded, almost to himself.

She sat on the couch, her glossy eyes watching him.

"I hope you like it. I know, I should've gotten the dog. I just..."

"Carlton?" She nearly whispered

His head shot straight to her, their eyes connecting. "Yes?"

"Stop."

"Stop, what?"

She shook her head slightly. "Stop acting like you're so tough and inconsiderate."

He swallowed, "It's an accurate statement." He was suffocating in there. She was making him oh so uncomfortable.

"No, it's not."

He laughed bitterly. "Ask my ex-wife."

"That's not funny." Suddenly, she grabbed her head.

"Are you alright?" He leaned forward a little, not crossing the invisible line between them but still making sure she was doing okay.

She nodded, "Yes. It's just a little headache. The stitches are a little sore."

It was then he noticed the black stitches across a bright red wound on her forehead. "Oh, Juliet..." He whispered to himself.

Her head shot up from her hand as quick as light. "What?" _Had he just used her first name?_

His eyes grew just slightly. "Uh, nothing. I just need to get going, actually. I'm glad you're alright, O'Hara." He turned towards the door, and his hand hit the knob when she spoke.

"Carlton..." She jumped up and ran towards the door. She laid her hand on his shoulder in an effort to stop him, and he glanced over his shoulder.

He looked down at his own two feet. "You don't want to do this, Juliet."

She shook her head, "Don't tell me what I want or don't want." She sighed, "Carlton, I can't do this alone."

It was quick like lightening when he suddenly turned around and had her pinned to the wall. "You get one chance, O'Hara. One chance. I'm old. I'm not a very good person. I'm not good for you. I'm grouchy, I'm grumpy, and I'm inconsiderate no matter what you may think. Now... if you want this, now's the time. But if you don't, you have to say something."

She bravely looked into his eyes. "The puppy's eyes probably looked like yours." And to his shock, she fisted his shirt in her hands, and kissed him.

The make out that occurred against her living room wall was dangerous. It was unchartered territory and it could leave them both hurt. But when a certain psychic walked it, everything changed.

One hundred and eighty degrees.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Check chapter one for the disclaimer. :) Almost all of the characters in this chapter are extremely OCC, I know, but this is fanFICTION!

**One Step Forward, Two Steps Back**

**Chapter 2**

**kateandharvey**

"Woah! What's going on _here_? A little tonsil hockey, Jules? I'm sorry to interrupt the game with Mr. Stud." Shawn slyly stuck his hand out, "Shawn Spencer, consultant for the Santa Barbara- _Lassie_?"

Juliet closed her eyes, her hand over her mouth. She didn't need this right now. Her head was so messed around with what just happened, what Shawn had just _interrupted_.

"I need to go." Carlton stiffly ground out, moving past Shawn to the door.

"What? But the party just started! You didn't even hit second base!"

"Shawn!" Juliet snapped, "_Don't_."

"Why the hostility, Jules? He's the one that-"

Gus entered the door, interrupting Shawn. "What's wrong with Lassie? He just ran out of here like Shawn during a spelling test in grade school."

"Hey, man! Sometimes people confuse their d's and b's!"

"Yes, Shawn, but people don't spell bee as dee."

"It was first grade!"

"So? Children should _still_ know the difference between-"

"Guys!" Juliet sighed, rubbing her throbbing temple. "I need you to go. I need some rest."

"You're just going to throw us out?" Shawn questioned.

"I'm not _ throwing_ you out, I just need some time alone, okay?"

"Time alone? With all due respect, Jules, we came here to check on you and you're going to throw us out while Lassie's tongue down your throat wasn't a problem?"

"_What_?Shawn, what are you talking about?" Gus asked.

"Oh my goodness! Just go, please!" Juliet exclaimed, "Please."

Shawn nodded, "Sure, _Detective O'Hara._ We'll leave. Sorry for caring." He turned to Gus, "Come on, Gus. Let's go. We know when we're not wanted."

Gus was confused. "What's going on?"

"I'll tell you in the car." And Shawn and Gus left, shutting the door behind them.

Juliet sank to the floor. She'd just thoroughly pissed off one of her best friends, and completely ruined the relationship with the one man she trusted with her whole self.

Oddly, she was more worried about the second one.

* * *

><p><em>"This is Lassiter, leave a message."<em>

His curt voice was the only thing that came through the phone everytime she'd called. She _had_ left messages. One after the other after the other.

She sighed. "It's me again, Juliet... Look, you can't hide forever, you know? Just, uh, call me back when you get this, I guess... I don't regret it, Carlton. I know you probably think I do, but I don't."

She hung up.

She held her head in her hands. Her life was in pieces, her head wouldn't stop throbbing, and she hadn't seen her partner in _three days_.

Suddenly, she perked up. She was going to see Carlton. Whether he wanted to see her or not.

He couldn't run forever.

* * *

><p>"Carlton, damn it! The only thing you're doing by not answering the door is pissing me off!" She knocked harder on the door. "I know you're home! Answer the door!"<p>

Slowly, just as she was about to turn and leave, the door creaked open. He leaned against the door frame. He looked exhausted. "What are you doing here, O'Hara?"

"I wouldn't be here if you would have answered your phone!"

"Would you please keep your voice down?" He whispered. "I didn't answer because I was...preoccupied."

"Really?" She crossed her arms, "Whatever, Carlton. Look, I just came to tell you that I don't regret it. I know you think I do, but-"

"I don't think you regret it, O'Hara."

"Please, I know you. You're probably in there," She gestured inside the home, "sitting around, thinking you're so gross and so unworthy and how dare you even touch me at all. Well guess what, Carlton. I'm tired of the games."

"O'Hara, now really isn't a good time-"

"I'm tired of pretending like you're my partner. I'm sick of talking about how much I look up to you. I'm so, so, tired of ignoring the way you look at me sometimes, and the brushing of hands as we hand things to each other. I pissed Shawn off, I confused the hell out of Gus, I scared you off most likely for good, my head won't stop god damn _pounding_ and I'm probably just all doped up on the meds, but I think you feel for me the same way I do for you."

"O'Hara-"

"I don't even know what I'm saying, or where I'm going with this, and you probably think I'm crazy, but even since that kiss, all I can think about is you. I know you're scared, Carlton. You're smart but you don't know everything. I want you to touch me, I want to be kissed by you. This is crazy and totally out of line, but someone has to say something and I know there's no way you'll do it, so I am."

"Really, O'Hara, you don't understand-"

"If you want to report me to Vick and have me fired, I'll understand but I can't go one more minute without telling you that I think we have something here, I think we've always had something and I-"

"-Carly, baby? What's taking you so long?"

In that moment, Juliet's whole world rocked. Victoria Lassiter was standing, in a towel, behind her partner.

"Oh my God." She breathed in slow, deep breaths. "Oh my God."

"Oh, I'm sorry!" Victoria shook her head innocently, "Am I interrupting something about work, Darling?" She ran her hand down Lassiter's bicep.

"I'm the sorry one." Juliet quietly spoke. She turned, and walked away.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Once again, see chapter one for the disclaimer. And also, thank you so much for all of your reviews! They make me so happy! :) For your hard work of reviewing the last chapter, you get this one sooner than planned! Please let me know if you have anything specific you'd like to see in the story, sometimes I run into a little creative brain fart XP

**One Step Forward, Two Steps Back**

**Chapter 3**

**kateandharvey**

She remembers thinking if she was labeling it as a story, she'd be torn between strong friendship and romance. The night was so magical, as if the sparkles were floating in the air. She felt like she was living in a perfume commercial; he was so relaxed, so...enchanting...

_He walked in, stiffly clearing his throat as he always did when he was nervous, and she briefly caught sight of the rose he carried in his hand. He glanced around the restaurant, checking to make sure no one he knew was present. She had no idea what he was doing there. She sat at the table in the far corner, examining him as he gracefully walked towards her. _

_"O'Hara? What are you doing here?" He asked._

_"I could ask you the same thing." She winked. It was supposed to be a teasing wink, but it somehow came out flirtatiously and she knew it._

_"You could." He conceded, not offering an answer. But she wasn't surprised. She knew him._

_"I'm meeting someone." She hated the quick flash of hurt in his eyes. (She noticed, yes, but it was an odd night- something in the air no doubt.) She sounded like a child, trying to insist she was there to meet someone, trying to sound not so...lame._

_"You are." It wasn't a statement, but not a full question. More a covered up surprise he wanted her to catch on to._

_She nodded, "I am." She cleared her throat, "My friend... She set it up. She insists I put too much time into the job."_

_"You can never take too many slime balls off the street, O'Hara." _

_She smiled slightly, acknowledging his comment and continuing with her explanation. "It's silly, really. I'm wearing this absolutely hideous maroon thing," she gestured to the scarf around her neck, "And he's supposed to come with-"_

_"-A red rose." He finished._

_Her eyes rose from the table to meet his. "Yes."_

_He cleared his throat, shifting slightly. "Your friend... Caroline?"_

_She nodded, "Yes."_

_He contemplated the situation. He examined all the evidence before making a plan of action. Finally, after a few seconds, he handed her the rose. "I guess this is yours, then."_

_She smiled and he smiled tightly in return, but it was a Carlton smile. One she only saw occasionally. She gestured to the seat across from her, "I guess that's yours, then."_

_And he sat down._

_They chatted about work, and Shawn, and Vick. Juliet joked about how Shawn would surely know about their blind date by Monday while Lassiter told her adamantly there was no way he would ever find out because he was, without a doubt, __not a psychic. Eventually, they talked about Shawn and Gus and their friendship. _

_She explained to him that even though they argue, and they're two different people, it's their history that keeps them together._

_He said that history isn't a reason to stay in a relationship._

_She elaborated, telling him it was a respect that was gained from the history, and the familiar territory that made it important. She confessed to him she doesn't have many friends she truly considers a real_ _friend__, and he laughed telling her she didn't make any sense but he understood what she was saying. She said every friend she'd ever had had left her._

_He told her she had plenty of friends. And even if she didn't she'd easily make some as she wasn't completely intolerable. He winked at her after that._

_She blushed._

_He stared down at the table for a long hard few seconds, and she laid her hand on his arm. He looked up at her, placed his hand over hers on his arm, and told her, "You're my best friend, O'Hara." _

_Her heart swelled._

_He drove her home that night, (she had walked the two blocks, the crazy woman) and while they stood outside her door, awkwardly trying to say goodnight, he leaned forward, and kissed her on the cheek. His fingers held hers as he did this and he gently told her, "I promise, I'll never leave you, Juliet." Her name rolled off his tongue and she wondered if it felt odd to him at all._

_One look into her eyes, and a quick squeeze to her fingers, and he was gone._

* * *

><p>She hurt, but she didn't know why.<p>

She was sad, filled with a feeling of emptiness. But she didn't have anything to feel empty about.

She felt betrayed. But why?

The man loved his wife.

He was with his wife.

_Ex-wife_. Her heart reminded.

He was _trying_ to work things out with his wife. Her brain jumped in.

She nearly confessed her love for him with his _wife_ in the other room. In a _towel_. She cursed herself, she didn't want to remember the towel.

She was lost.

She'd always been lost.

But when you find your way, being lost again is a lot harder.

Because you had it, only for it to be taken.

You _know_ what you're missing out on.

And Juliet O'Hara, was missing out on Carlton Lassiter.


End file.
